Astérix et les Vikings (2006) (mini-review++)

(If you’re curious, my review process. It’s also pasted at the end of this post. I don’t believe in Rotten Tomatoes. I just believe in me.)

(***all-purpose SPOILER ALERT*** there may be some in this review)

acting 5

directing 5

effects 5

editing 5

writing 5

SW SCORE: 25

2.5 out of 5 🐙

++

I was gonna write a really snarky and mean review of this movie, but then something stopped me. This movie is exactly what it is trying to be. It is a silly and cheerful adaptation of a beloved comic book for kids. The animation is light and fun and it reminded me of the super annoying arcade game from the 80s, ‘Dragon’s Lair’. The character voices are appropriately exaggerated and comical. The plot could fit on a three panel comic strip: Asterix and Obelix are charged with rescuing the chief’s lazy millennial-type, doofus nephew. After they do so, they have to train said doofus so that he is a worthy successor to his uncle. 

It will probably be fun for your little nephew (or niece) to watch. 

If you have to sit there and watch it with them, be on the lookout for a training montage set to an incredibly bad cover of Survivor’s hit, ‘Eye of the Tiger’. Other than that, you can probably play Candy Crush on your phone while they enjoy it. 

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(1) Shark Wrighter (SW) Score: Based on a sum of 5 sub-scores (acting, directing, writing/story, effects: cinematography &/or animation &/or effects, editing) with 1 being terrible and 10 being terrific.

(2) Octopuses (0-5 🐙, with 5 being fantastic and 0 being feces)

(3) Octopuses are my unquantifiable feeling…not that SW score is scientific…but this one is even less so

(4) ++ This optional section includes any incredibly *brilliant observations that don’t fit into simple quantitative slices like the scores and octopuses *(they are likely NOT brilliant)

 

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