(If you’re curious, my review process. It’s also pasted at the end of this post. I don’t believe in Rotten Tomatoes. I just believe in me.)
(***all-purpose SPOILER ALERT*** there may be some in this review)
SW SCORE: 31
3 out of 5 🐙
I’m not the person who should be commenting on this movie. I’m not a fan of the franchise. I recognize it is well made. I recognize the action set pieces are well crafted. I recognize Tom Cruise is very experienced at carrying a big action flick. I recognize the supporting actors acquit themselves just fine. But I just don’t care. I never enjoyed the TV show. The universe just doesn’t appeal to me. I think this was the first one I saw since the first one.
Here are some things I noticed about a movie I was unfairly prejudiced against:
Ethan (played by Tom Cruise) says at one point “I don’t understand what I’m involved in.”
I did think Sean Harris played a delightfully creepy main villain. I enjoyed his performance best out of all the turns in the film. Peeps raved about Henry Cavill and you can call me a hater but I’m just not a big Superman fan and I never really watched a Cavill performance and left thinking “Wow, that was amazing.” He played a fine top lieutenant baddie but his role didn’t leave a mark on my imagination like Harris’.
Pulp Fiction is my favorite movie. When it came out, I thought almost everyone in that movie defined cool and Ving Rhames was no exception. But when he was on screen here, I just felt like he was playing a role that belonged to a younger man. The same could be said for Cruise. It felt like he was just kind of going through the motions. It hurts me to write what I’m about to write: Ving Rhames didn’t seem cool anymore. And, yes, that could be due to the writing but I can only judge the end result.
The movie in general felt like a loosely connected series of chases. The chases included: cars (traditional), motorcycles (traditional), helicopters, foot race (traditional), and cliff-side climbing.
Look, if you’re a fan of this franchise, friends of mine who are fans say this movie is awesome. So, you should probably go see it. If you’re on the fence, I’d recommend any of the Bourne franchise films.
(1) Shark Wrighter (SW) Score: Based on a sum of 5 sub-scores (acting, directing, writing/story, effects: cinematography &/or animation &/or effects, editing) with 1 being terrible and 10 being terrific.
(2) Octopuses (0-5 🐙, with 5 being fantastic and 0 being feces)
(3) Octopuses are my unquantifiable feeling…not that SW score is scientific…but this one is even less so
(4) ++ This optional section includes any incredibly *brilliant observations that don’t fit into simple quantitative slices like the scores and octopuses *(they are likely NOT brilliant)