(If you’re curious, my review process. It’s also pasted at the end of this post. I don’t believe in Rotten Tomatoes. I just believe in me.)
(***all-purpose SPOILER ALERT*** there may be some in this review)
SW SCORE: 38
3.8 out of 5 🐙
When I first saw this movie, I was 15 years old and I was a freshman in high school. We had just finished studying the play and our professor showed this movie to us. We were a bunch of immature kids in puberty. And what I remember clearly is there is one scene where Juliet bounds out of bed and her nipple is clearly exposed for a moment. The entire class twittered as if they were in on a grand, lecherous conspiracy the likes of Marquis de Sade. Other than that, I don’t remember much.
I’m not really a fan of Shakespeare. Of course, I recognize his mastery of the language. But, like in Othello, a lot of his plots rest on such naive conceits. In Othello, for instance, Othello, who loves his wife, turns completely against her and starts a horrifying sequence of events ALL BECAUSE A GUY HE KNOWS IS SHADY IS TALKING SHIT ABOUT HER FIDELITY. If-I dunno-he had just had a conversation with his wife WHO HE KNOWS IS OF GOOD CHARACTER and really investigated the accusations that were being made about her, none of that shit would have happened. But he justs trusts his friend completely. Similarly, through incompetence Romeo isn’t notified about Juliet’s fake death BECAUSE THE LETTER TO INFORM ROMEO NEVER GOT TO HIM so he kills himself and she subsequently kills herself when she wakes up from her fake death and sees him lying next to her dead. His whole suicide is basically because of SLOW OR UNDELIVERED MAIL. Your climax should NOT rest on postal logistics. Maybe in a situation like this, the Friar should have personally ridden his horse to tell Romeo and not taken a chance with the post? Don’t you think if you had a plan to fake death, you would do everything in your power to notify the affected parties first? I find the obstacles to this notification in Romeo and Juliet to be insufficient so the impact of the tragic end makes me roll my eyes more than my heart. What can I tell you? I’m not the target demo for Willy’s stuff.
With regard to this adaptation in general, it’s perfectly cromulent. There is good acting and the costumes and sets are lovely. The editing is prudent and the play moves along very quickly. Let’s remember: the stage version is hours longer. It’s fine. It’s not for me. but it’s fine. If you love Shakespeare, this will be your jam.
(1) Shark Wrighter (SW) Score: Based on a sum of 5 sub-scores (acting, directing, writing/story, effects: cinematography &/or animation &/or effects, editing) with 1 being terrible and 10 being terrific.
(2) Octopuses (0-5 🐙, with 5 being fantastic and 0 being feces)
(3) Octopuses are my unquantifiable feeling…not that SW score is scientific…but this one is even less so
(4) ++ This optional section includes any incredibly *brilliant observations that don’t fit into simple quantitative slices like the scores and octopuses *(they are likely NOT brilliant)