Long Shot (2019) (mini-review++)

long-shot-seth-rogen-charlize-theron(If you’re curious, my review process. It’s also pasted at the end of this post. I don’t believe in Rotten Tomatoes. I just believe in me.)

(***all-purpose SPOILER ALERT*** there may be some in this review)

acting 7

directing 8

effects 7

editing 7

writing 8


4 out of 5 🐙


Ffffuuuuucccckkkkk! What a good time! I love Seth Rogen in every movie he is in. Even if the movie is shit, I just think he resonates “good guy” and he is a funny guy. I get the same vibe from Paul Rudd. He’s also a guide proxy for us schlubby looking dudes. Granted, he has actual talent. I’m just schlubby. But I love to see him work. And Charlize Theron? What can I say that hasn’t been said? Somehow, unlike every other human on earth, she is getting hotter with age. Actually, I would give this prop to Jude Law as well. The dude has shed his earlier waifish look for rugged. Respect. Besides her looks, she is just a beacon of light blowing charisma into your eyeholes. Is this movie just another version of Notting Hill? Another version of the normal guy fantasy of dating a celebrity chick? Sure. But I sure don’t care.  It rocks. Oh, and the clubbing scene. Jesus. I spit my ramen on my keyboard laughing out loud. Oh shit. I forgot. Cube’s kid, O’Shea, was great. Nice to see him do comedy work after Straight Outta Compton.







(1) Shark Wrighter (SW) Score: Based on a sum of 5 sub-scores (acting, directing, writing/story, effects: cinematography &/or animation &/or effects, editing) with 1 being terrible and 10 being terrific.

(2) Octopuses (0-5 🐙, with 5 being fantastic and 0 being feces)

(3) Octopuses are my unquantifiable feeling…not that SW score is scientific…but this one is even less so

(4) ++ This optional section includes any incredibly *brilliant observations that don’t fit into simple quantitative slices like the scores and octopuses *(they are likely NOT brilliant)


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