Ready Player One (2018) (mini-review++)


(If you’re curious, my review process. It’s also pasted at the end of this post. I don’t believe in Rotten Tomatoes. I just believe in me.)

(***all-purpose SPOILER ALERT*** there may be some in this review)

The mini-review:

Ready Player One

acting 8

directing 8

writing 8

effects 9

editing 8

SW score: 41

4.1 out of 5 octopi


I’ve read the book. So you can stow that shit.



This is an adaptation of the book of the same name. It’s a dystopian future set in Columbus, Ohio. People are generally miserable and everyone plays this intense virtual reality game called the Oasis. It’s so popular it’s the most valuable company on Earth. You can be anyone or anything you want in the Oasis. The Oasis’ creator was a huge 80’s pop culture fan so the Oasis is littered with those references. One day the creator dies and says whoever wins his contest gets control of the Oasis. And that’s the plot of the movie. The contest with the requisite Spielbergian good young adults/teens versus the evil mega entity.

Here we go. Hold on to your butts.


Climb Mount Everest with Batman

“Losing your shit means losing your shit.”

Star Trek


THE Delorean



Jurassic Park


Akira’s bike

Iron Giant

“Take On Me” by Aha


Buggles: ‘Video Killed the Radio Store’

Peter Parker

Bruce Banner

Magic Fingers Bed

Space invaders

Bill and Ted


Holy Hand Grenade


Tootsie Pop Owl


Steve Jobs



Dark Crystal


Duran Duran

Buckaroo Bonzai

Bee Gees: Staying Alive’

Millennium falcon

John Hughes

Ferris Bueller

Breakfast Club

Tab (the soda)


The Fly

Say Anything

The Shining

Atari 2600

Nancy Drew

Magic 8 Ball



Adventure (1979 game)

Twisted Sister





Those weird monster face bouncy plastic balls from the 80’s

T2 style death scene

Streeet fighter energy blast move

Extra Life


Mario Kart


“Because reality is real”

Even the evil villain had a change of heart

Now to the amateur film review-y type shit:

So let’s talk Steve. In my opinion, he hasn’t made a fully fun and great movie since Catch Me If You Can in 2002. He’s done several good movies which are of fine quality and good production value and decent acting and such: all Spielberg staples. But all of those interim movies aren’t anything I’m that interested in seeing again. I rewatch Catch Me If You Can If I come across it, for example. I can’t say the same for War Horse.

But this movie was just plain fun and funny. Speilberg has always been good at directing young people and this flick is no exception. It reminded me of his opus, E. T. The Extra-Terrestrial.

It, of course, did not match the sincerity or beauty of the E. T. but it felt like its distant cousin.

A word on adaptation: I loved the book but Speilberg absolutely employed the correct strategy. An adaptation should be true to the heart of the novel but its own independent telling. It was.

I’m gonna go see it again. Make sure you see it at least once.




(1) Shark Wrighter (SW) Score: Based on a sum of 5 sub-scores (acting, directing, writing/story, effects: cinematography &/or animation &/or effects, editing) with 1 being terrible and 10 being terrific.

(2) Octopuses (0-5 🐙, with 5 being fantastic and 0 being feces)

(3) Octopuses are my unquantifiable feeling…not that SW score is scientific…but this one is even less so

(4) ++ This optional section includes any incredibly *brilliant observations that don’t fit into simple quantitative slices like the scores and octopuses *(they are likely NOT brilliant)


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