(If you’re curious, my review process. It’s also pasted at the end of this post. I don’t believe in Rotten Tomatoes. I just believe in me.)
(***all-purpose SPOILER ALERT*** there may be some in this review)
Night at the Museum
SW score: 29
2.5 out of 5 octopi
++ Jumanji (1995) was not very good. This is like a poor man’s version of Jumanji. Ben Stiller is fine. The story is fine. Do you want to be described as fine? No, you don’t. This movie elicits as much emotion as a day at a museum. No, that’s not fair. Museums can be fascinating. Robin Williams is underused and it’s not his fault. You can only improvise so much and if the script doesn’t give you the lines, you can’t make miracles. The character he is saddled with is mediocre.
(1) Shark Wrighter (SW) Score: Based on a sum of 5 sub-scores (acting, directing, writing/story, effects: cinematography &/or animation &/or effects, editing) with 1 being terrible and 10 being terrific.
(2) Octopuses (0-5 🐙, with 5 being fantastic and 0 being feces)
(3) Octopuses are my unquantifiable feeling…not that SW score is scientific…but this one is even less so
(4) ++ This optional section includes any incredibly *brilliant observations that don’t fit into simple quantitative slices like the scores and octopuses *(they are likely NOT brilliant)